In any journey of recovery, there will inevitably come the moments that are harder than others. Where it's almost like your brain forgets how it's supposed to work. Where the darkness you've fought so hard to keep at bay, comes storming back. I guess that's what depression can do to a person.
It's no surprise that this time of year can do that to a person. The pressure of the holidays. The busyness of everyday life. The realization that there will be several people missing from your holiday get togethers this year.
Sometimes the darkness comes back. Whether we want it to or not, it does. You fight it, but it's still there. And it seems like the more that you fight, the harder it races back to you.
Darkness has found me again.
Don't worry, it's not the scary kind of darkness, more like the dusk of a winter night, where fog blankets everything. My head is still poking out, and I can see the light on the horizon.
I know that I'll reach it. It may not happen as quickly as I'd like it to, but it will happen.
If you find yourself in the midst of darkness, know that you aren't alone and that there is such great strength in the honesty of owning these moments. Admitting you need some help doesn't make you weak. It means quite the opposite.
Reach out and take my hand. I'll walk with you through your darkness. We'll break through the fog together.
As always you can keep up with me over at ohhaiiitsbrandii.wordpress.com
Until next time,